Anonymous

One of the things I like best about my job is the occasional thank you note I get.

When I first started working here, I got an email from a guy thanking me for the story I'd written about his cruise through Antarctica. He told me he'd keep my name on file, in case he ever needed someone to help write his memoirs. He was joking, but it still made me feel super fantastic inside.

A couple of my nicer notes

Another time, I got a big box full of chocolate covered strawberries, for writing an advance article about a benefit event for the victims of the Japanese tsunami. Other folks send me simple notes of thanks that make my day every time I open them.

Sadly, there are also the kinds of people who send things like this:

I found this in my newsroom mailbox a couple weeks ago. Honestly, once my initial shock wore off (I do not keep company with many hateful bigots, so it caught me by surprise that one felt he had any business to settle with me) I laughed a little. I mean, how ridiculous? The letter was quite obviously in response to an article I wrote a couple months ago about a young child who was born male but identifies as female. Her parents not only accepted this identity, but embraced it, and now allow the child to express herself publicly as a girl. In my humble opinion, it was a kick-ass story about a forward-thinking family unwilling to let their daughter fall through the cracks in a society that still (in this day and age!!) somehow has a hard time understanding that we are all different, and should all be celebrated, not shamed for it. I felt proud to have the opportunity to tell that family's story.

Letter Writer clearly was not so impressed. Sad. I feel sorry for him.

But I'm not surprised he decided to hide behind a shield of anonymity. He's clearly convinced he's got something to be ashamed about, or wouldn't he stand behind his opinion out in the open?

I've never gotten a thank you letter sent by an anonymous writer. And of all the criticisms I have received, the only ones that have actually made me stop and consider something I wrote were the ones written by critics who identified themselves. Writing in anonymously is like an instant tipoff that you're a foolish coward. And who thinks they have anything worthwhile to say?

Not me.

But now, with the internet, they're everywhere. The anonymous crazies are free to spread their venom throughout all kinds of online forums. We get it all the time on the paper's website. A while back, a man disappeared from our community. Days later, after the story spread through the papers and his friends joined forces to search nearby forest preserves hoping not to find a corpse, the man finally resurfaced. Alive. That's pretty much the only detail we papers got, and no real explanation was offered.

Hallelujah! A beloved husband, father-of-two, and active member of the community was found alive, after three days of lots and lots of people fearing the worst! Good news, right?

Wrong. People wanted answers. When they did not get answers, some volunteered their own guesses. And they were not pretty. In fact, one woman wrote a nasty, x-rated narrative of what she thought this guy might have been doing during his three days missing, and posted it on our web story about the guy's reunion with his family.

Sweet gal. Course, we didn't know who exactly she was, nor did any of our readers, because she threw it up there anonymously. And she wasn't the only one. We eventually had to disable comments on the story, to keep those anonymous vultures from sharing any more vile posts.

I'm still very, very new to the blogging world, but I'm a big blog reader, and I've read many times that nasty, anonymous posters lurk in the blogosphere too.

I worry about that, a little. It's one thing to have something I write about someone else criticized. This blog is about my life, and I imagine having that criticized would cut a little deeper. I hope it never happens.

But if (when?) it does, I hope I have the presence of mind to remember how cowardly it is to judge others while sheltering yourself from being judged.

And also, I hope I have a killer comeback.